The fact that you want to know how to support your friend means you are already helping her. You care about her, and that’s all that matters. Just being there is one of the best things you can do when your friend is experiencing an unexpected pregnancy. She knows you are on her side. 

Here are a few other suggestions to encourage her during this time:

Help Her Physically 

Some women experience pregnancy symptoms immediately. Others don’t feel anything for a while. If your friend is going through early signs of pregnancy, she’s most likely feeling tired, nauseous, and overwhelmed. Show her some kindness by doing something for her. Here are a few ideas:

• Help her do everyday tasks like laundry, cleaning, or the dishes.
• Do her grocery shopping.
• Have her favorite meal delivered (Ask if she’s experiencing another pregnancy symptom–food aversions or cravings)
• Treat her to the movies or an evening out if she feels up to it.
• Take her some flowers and spruce up her home. 
• Go for a walk.

Encourage Her to Get Answers

Sometimes, a late period and positive pregnancy test won’t tell the whole story. Experts estimate as many as 26% of all pregnancies end in a miscarriage. It is possible to get a positive pregnancy test days or even weeks after a miscarriage because it takes a woman’s body time to return to pre-pregnancy hormone levels.

How can she find out if her pregnancy is growing or if she’s had a miscarriage? She should take another pregnancy test and consider an ultrasound exam. Anderson House offers free pregnancy tests. Encourage your friend to come to one of our locations to retest. If the test is positive, we can offer her an ultrasound referral. 

An ultrasound detects if her pregnancy is developing or if she’s miscarried. Ultrasound also guards her health by detecting if the pregnancy is ectopic. An ectopic pregnancy is growing outside the uterus and can be dangerous. 

Practice Active Listening

Active listening is a communication skill that goes beyond hearing what a person says. It requires focusing on the person and responding to the intention of what they are saying.

It can be tricky, especially when someone is overwhelmed and rambling about the possibilities of what might happen. Try and hear what’s behind their words. Are they afraid? Sad? Angry? Be the person they can truly confide in. 

Only Offer Your Opinion If Asked

It can be tempting to tell your friend what to do, but she needs to make her own decision about how to handle the pregnancy. Wait for your friend to ask for advice. Let her know you are there for them no matter what.

Pregnancy is a life-altering experience, and so is whatever choice she makes. Encourage her to get information about all of her options. Your love and support will make a world of difference at this time.

Let Anderson House Help Her

The caring client advocates at Anderson House offer free pregnancy services, including information about her options and prenatal and childbirth education. We’re here to help her. 

Have your friend make a free appointment and plan on joining her if she would like. We can give her the support and care she needs.